Closer to home

When we were young, we'd sometimes wish of having super powers. Some pick the power to fly, while others pick telepathic abilities. I used to think that the power to teleport wherever I wanted was the best power to wish for. I shared this idea with my mom and she told me that it was a selfish power to want. I agreed with her; until now, I still do. Being the severely optimistic child I was (not sure if I'm joking here. whatever), I decided to wish for the power to be able to take other people's pain or sickness, because the ability to completely obliterate someone else's suffering is absurd.  I thought it was a noble power to wish for. Also, I was at the age when the main objective was to impress my parents and I concluded that being a "thoughtful" kid would wow my mother. So I said I wished for the power to be able to feel the suffering of others instead of having to feel it themselves. Mind you, there's nothing noble about being arrogant - I was convinced that I could handle everyone else's suffering. Of course now, I don't believe in super powers and don't wish for any (unless the occasional daydream requires it).

Today, however, to my dismay, I feel as if an imaginative childhood desire translated into reality. Today is my mom's 50th birthday. I greeted her this morning rather sheepishly. She never expects much from me, or from any of her children. A hug and greeting is always fine, she'd say. I could not hug her today, on her 50th birthday. In place of that hug, I remembered my childhood desired super power and was convinced that it came true just for today, even without me knowing it at first.  Mom, in place of that hug, I hope that today: whatever was meant went as planned, you felt no physical or mental stress, and you did not feel embarrassed for whatever reason, because today I think my childhood super power became a reality.

Forgive me for blogging this. I am truly happy for my mom that today is her 50th birthday. I write this blog because there's no other place to express what I can't help but feel. It's probably just one of those days. I don't know.